Back on Track

This isn't so much a reading devotion as it is a personal reflection of my direction. I've been struggling with things that are somewhat in my control but my flaw is that I'm allowing it to become my Lord, my God. I'm allowing things to capture my mind to where my worship is hallow and spirit is down. I cannot allow the devil to steal my joy.

The devil stealing my joy, that's an interesting statement because I don't go on blaming every little thing on the devil. Sometimes, it's our fault! Sometimes, our selfishness and pride gets in the way of God's blessings and WE are the ones who bring pain and suffering upon ourselves.

As my daily devotions declined so did my worldly influences increase. I began to once again think as the world does. Not in ways to dominate and control everything around us but the same thing internally. I'm trying to control my emotions and desires without worship, without Jesus at the center. I haven't been picking up my guitar to worship... yes I do to play, but not to honor the King.

So I need accountability really bad. But who should I turn to? Do I go to someone who can mentor me or someone I can just talk to, a spiritual friend and companion? But I don't want to see like a complainer either? And that's something I noticed too, that I tend to gravitate to accountability when I need something... not necessarily a bad thing but not what I'm envisioning for accountability.

Sometimes I wish I were back in ministry. I'm still in ministry at NHSI but really into it where I'm seeing my brothers and sisters weekly and not just once a month. Should I go back to Men's ministry? Maybe with my dad? Or should I get involved more at Farrington, maybe with the sound team again or audition for Frontlines with Dane? So many things but I need to center my life back on Jesus before anything else. I cannot seek something in this world to fill my heart, only Jesus can I and need to spend time with Him.