As they danced, they sang: "Saul has slain his thousands, and David his tens of thousands." Saul was very angry; this refrain galled him. "They have credited David with tens of thousands," he thought, but me with only thousands. What more can he get but the kingdom? And from that time on Saul kept a jealous eye on David.
1 Samuel 18:7-9
Saul knew all that was going on, the battles won, the enemies defeated. He knew that David killed more than he so why did Saul get angry at this point? Because praises were being sung about David and not him! His heart became cold and bitter with the thought that God was with David and not himself.
What could Saul have done to do right and turn back to the LORD at this time? In his eyes, the only thing that he could've done was give his kingdom to him... anointing him king. But other things he could've done was to repent of everything he'd done. He could've embraced the new king, David; instead of hating him. His heart was selfish, prideful and evil; God could not work there.
Thinking about my life, I'm wondering where jealously is brewing. Is there something within me that craves something that another person has? Do I wish for more intellect, finances or responsibilities? Do I catch myself looking at what someone else with envy? There's a few things that pop into my head that don't seem like a big deal but I need to keep those thoughts captive and not allow them to grow. I need to offer those thoughts to God right now, nip it in the bud and pray for deliverance.
Heavenly Father, You know exactly what brewing in my heart whether or not I know about it. That's why Your mighty word teaches us to examine the motives of our hearts, because sin starts off quietly and out of consciousness. But that's when it's most easily defeated too. So I pray LORD God that You purge any thoughts not worthy of You and that my life is ready and available to head into battle. Amen.
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